Warrior
by MademoiselleFantastique
Summary: She's all alone, broken, left to be on her own. But even in her darkest hour, even in the moment full of pain, he's there. He won't let her go. / one shot, kitty/ryder implied.


Hello!

Lately, I'm totally into writing about Glee, I don't know where I take the ideas from though. Well, have fun reading.

* * *

_This is a story that I've never told, __I gotta get this off my chest to let it go,_

_I need to take back the light inside you stole, __you're a criminal_

_and you still like you're fraud._

* * *

Scream, scream and scream all the pain is real. Run, run, you know you won't make it but at least you can pretend that you tried. Can you feel your heart aching, can you feel it shattering? Can you feel your blood boiling? Can you, can you?

Can you feel the cold around you? Can you feel yourself losing it all? Can you feel the invisible pain you are going through? Can you see their disappointed faces, their hateful expressions? Can you, can you?

* * *

_All the pain and the truth __I wear like a battle wound,_

_so ashamed so confused, I'm not broken, or bruised._

* * *

"Get out of my way", the blonde cheerleader snapped harshly at a younger student and pushed her roughly out of the way. The young girl looked frightened at her and immediately Kitty felt guilt flashing in her. She didn't mean to let this happen every time but she knew exactly that she couldn't stop herself from doing it. It was the only way to pretend she was happy and complete, not lost and broken. She couldn't let go of the only thing that protected her.

Kitty was afraid that people would start seeing behind her mask and would recognize as who she really was. A scared little girl.

* * *

_Now I'm a warrior, __now I've got thicker skin, __now I'm a warrior._

_I'm stronger than I've ever been __and my armor, is made of steel, you can't get it._

_I'm a warrior __and you can never hurt me again._

* * *

"Kitty, may I know what you are talking about?", the head of the beautiful young girl snapped up to see how her teacher was looking at her, an annoyed look on her old, wrinkled face. Kitty snapped before she could react another way: "Well, since your lessons aren't as interesting as the gossip I just gathered, I suppose you don't have any right. But feel free to ask around yourself, I'm sure you are quite interested in the rumors people are spreading behind your back, miss."

"Excuse me?", the eyes of her teacher blinked rapidly as she tried to hide her hurt expression but Kitty could see it. She wasn't blind or dumb; she knew exactly what she had just said. And to be honest, it was easier to insult someone else instead of being the one who was insulted. She had taken that side of the medal much too long, she was tired of being the insulted one.

"You heard me perfectly well, miss."

It was no wonder that she got detention for this.

* * *

_Out of the ashes, burning like a fire, __you can save your apologies, you're nothing but a liar._

_I've got shame, I've got scars __but I will never show._

_I'm a survivor and always and you know._

_Cause all the pain and the truth __I wear like a battle wound,_

_so ashamed so confused, I'm not broken, or bruised._

* * *

"Kitty, will you come to my sleepover?"

"Hey, I was thinking that maybe you wanted to join my party on Saturday evening?"

"Kitty, will you go to the prom with me?"

"Keep talking and begging, perhaps one day I'll be listening", she replied smugly, leaving the handsome footballers and girls who had been asking her, past herself to go into the girls' bathroom. But Kitty wasn't pleased with herself, she was more sad.

_Why do guys keep asking you out? You are not handsome nor have you ever been. You are a pain in the ass; look at what you've done to Marley just because you were jealous that she got Puckerman and Lynn who would murder for her! The boys who are asking you out only want to get into your pants, they don't really care about you nor do they love you. They don't even know you, Kitty._

Tears were faster on Kitty's cheeks than she realized so she locked herself up in the bathroom. She didn't care that she was late for detention but she was scared.

Sometimes, she had those flashbacks, things she tried to suppress so hardly, she didn't want to see them, didn't want to be reminded of those horrible things that happened in the past.

She was so much stronger than that.

* * *

_Now I'm a warrior, __now I've got thicker skin, __now I'm a warrior._

_I'm stronger than I've ever been __and my armor, is made of steel, you can't get it._

_I'm a warrior __and you can never hurt me again._

* * *

She whipped the tears off of her beautiful face and tried to force a smile so she wouldn't look so pathetic anymore. Then she went out of the girls' bathroom to her class room where the detention was held. Kitty was quite sure she wouldn't be the only one there, at least a few football players or some idiots would be sitting there, maybe even someone who knew her. So the whole time wouldn't be – hopefully! – as boring as she imagined it to be.

When she stepped into the classroom, the teacher – it was Mister Schuester himself – was sitting behind the desk and looked up in surprise.

"Kitty", he glanced at the clock over the door, "you're late."

"Obviously", she said, pretending to be relaxed and not really interested in what he had to say. The teacher sighed and gestured towards a seat: "Sit down, Kitty. You'll be here until four o'clock."

Kitty nodded slowly and looked around the room, trying to find out who was in detention as well. So when she glanced around the room, pretending she was bored, she noticed four jocks , two girls who were dressed like they were vampires – probably Goths – and, to Kitty's surprise, Ryder Lynn as well. But he seemed to be deepened into something since he didn't look up and wrote eagerly at the paper that lay at his desk in front of him. Kitty rolled his eyes.

Ryder Lynn, the _perfectly happy boy whom everyone liked_. She curled her lips because unfortunately, she liked him as well. Not in an "I-really-want-to-be-his-girlfriend"-way but she had warmed up to him because he was _honest_. He had never been someone to just go away and pretend that he was happy; he actually fought when he didn't understand something but wanted to because he desperately wanted to be happy. That was something she admired because she knew exactly that she was too weak for that.

Kitty wasn't a dumb or silly girl. She had never slept with a boy, she was still untouched but she couldn't pretend that she hadn't been interested or hadn't made out with boys. Of course, she was only human and they were full of mistakes. But Kitty _loathed_ to be known as the school's slut.

* * *

_There's a part of me I can't get back._

_A little girl grew up too fast, __all it took was once, I'll never be the same._

_Now I take it back my life today, __nothing left that you can say_

_cause you were never gonna take the blame anyway._

* * *

Four o'clock. It was done. _Finally_.

"Goodbye, guys", Mister Schue said with a glance at the clock before he clapped his hands together and smiled at the bunch of students who groaned out. They were free, _at last._

She stood up and hurried to get out of the class room. For the past fifteen minutes, Ryder had been looking surreptitiously at her and she had always looked away, pretending she hadn't seen him staring at her until they locked eyes with each other. And for the first time Kitty could think of she had been _blushing_ and hurried to look away.

As soon as she stepped out of the room, Mister Schuester held her back: "Kitty, could I have a word?"

She rolled her eyes before she forced – again – a smile on her lips and turned around to face a worried teacher: "Yeah, Mister Schue?"

The two Goth-girls stepped past Kitty and eyed her suspiciously before they turned around to walk out of the room. As soon as the room was empty (well, if you don't count Schue and Kitty), he started to speak: "I heard from my colleagues that you have been very moody lately. Is that true?"

Kitty's smile disappeared. She hated it when teachers talked to each other to talk about their pupils and their bad behaviors. So she just shrugged her shoulders and smiled sweetly: "I don't know what you are talking about."

"Kitty", he sighed. "You don't have to pretend. It's not lately, Kitty. I know that something is on your mind what bothers you. But I can only help you if you let me."

"I don't need any help", she said coldly, her smile frozen. She hated it to death when people could read her like an open book, when they could see how she felt. Kitty wanted to be someone unreadable.

"Look, Kitty, I know you cried. Your eyes were red when you entered the room."

That took the wind out of Kitty's sail and she eyed her teacher suspiciously. Well, he certainly wasn't dumb after all. But he wasn't supposed to know. Nobody was.

"Mister Schuester, I don't want any help nor do I need it. I appreciate your concern but I really want you to know that you are so if you excuse me, I need to go home, my parents will get worried otherwise", she replied sweetly and walked towards the door. But as soon as she reached it, Mister Schue held her back a last time by saying: "Tears won't wash away your fears."

That scared Kitty probably more than it actually should.

* * *

_Now I'm a warrior, __now I've got thicker skin, __now I'm a warrior._

_I'm stronger than I've ever been __and my armor, is made of steel, you can't get it._

_I'm a warrior __and you can never hurt me again._

* * *

"Kitty."

"Lynn."

Well, it certainly looked like he had been waiting for her but she wasn't interested in talking to him – or anyone – after that conversation with Mister Schuester.

"I want to talk to you."

"Well, what if I don't want to talk to you? Didn't think about that, did you, Lynn?", she snapped harshly, pretending to be annoyed. But in fact she was frightened that he had been ears dropping. The last thing she wanted to know that he knew that she was actually scared. He may did not know why but he certainly knew _that she did_ and that was enough for Kitty to hate the feeling that overcame her right now. The feeling of fear and helplessness.

But Ryder just chuckled at her harsh response: "Well, actually, I already knew you would refuse to talk to me. Didn't think about that, did you?"

She hated that he used her own sentence against herself.

"Go. Away", she breathed with impatiently voice and started to walk past him but he grabbed her roughly at her wrist.

Okay, that surprised her definitely. She never thought he would even lay a single finger on her and now he was being violent?

"Want to scream me for help? Mister Schuester is still in there", she nodded her head in direction to the room where the two of them just had detention. Ryder smiled weakly before he weakened his grip: "Look, I don't want to hurt you, I just want to speak to you. A few words, just you and me."

_Just you and me._

_It'll be our secret, Kitty._

_You won't tell anyone, will you?_

The blonde girl shuddered at the flashbacks of the voice she detested, of the voice that had made her life a living hell as a younger girl.

Ryder seemed to notice that something had happened to her.

"Kitty, are you okay? Kitty?", he asked worried, true concern in his voice. His grip tightened again as he saw how Kitty struggled to stand on her own feet.

"Kitty?", he asked, again, holding now both of her wrists in his hands. He didn't want her to faint out, he liked her after all.

"It's okay, Ryder, it's okay", she closed her eyes for a minute before she realized that she had called him by his name instead of his surname. But Ryder didn't say a word; he just stood there, watching the blonde.

"You sure?"

"No, not really", she answered weakly but tried to smile so he wouldn't be worried any longer. But that didn't cause the effect she was planning for.

"I'm going to take you home then", he simply said and she didn't dare to interrupt or to say no, she just went with him.

"You have a car?", she eyed the little silver car – a VW rabbit – and looked back to Ryder who just grinned and nodded silently.

"Yeah, my dad bought himself a new one and I got the old family car. But it's good though, isn't it?", his gaze was full of pride as he looked at the car before he held her the door open.

As they both sat down and he started to drive, she spoke up for the first time: "First of all, thanks for bringing me home, Ryder. I appreciate it. Second, thanks for not leaving me there in the hall by myself when you saw how I struggled."

His smile disappeared but his eyes continued to be fixed on the street: "I couldn't let you there. I am no monster."

"I know!", she hurried to say; he had took it the completely wrong way!

"But still, thank you. There was no need to but… yeah."

His cute smile came back: "You are actually really nice, Kitty. And no problem, you are welcome."

His statement confused her unwillingly. Of course she was a nice girl but just, no one had the balls to look through her mask. Everyone just saw the bad, naughty and bitchy cheerleader but it surprised her that he of all people had seen through her. So she remained silent, trying to work out how he did that.

"Can I talk to you now? As a… let's say repayment for driving you home?", he asked patiently, while he turned right at a crossing. She was surprised that he knew the way to her home but chose to stay silent.

"I don't have much of a choice, do I? So spit it out", as she said that she knew that it didn't sound half as annoyed as it was supposed to be. To be quite honest, she was curious about what he wanted to talk to with her.

Ryder took a deep breath before his eyes searched hers, locking. And she actually knew his question the moment before he really said it.

_"Will you go to the prom with me?"_

* * *

This actually isn't how I planned it to be but never mind, I don't want to change it because I really like them (as friends and I would love it if they became a couple in Glee *sigh*).

I actually wanted this one shot to be dark and sad and I wanted Ryder to be there for Kitty as friends but tbh, it didn't work out so… yeah, hope it's still good.

Leave me reviews? :)


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